“Hey friend, we need to have a heart to heart.” I pray that you have friends in your life that approach you this way? If not, go find some. You need them. They need you. Not everyone deserves speaking rights into your life, but let’s face it, at least one person needs to have that privilege.
Way too often we neglect the truth in that we each need correction in order to grow. I personally look at this from a biblical perspective. One of my favorite scriptures is found in 2 Timothy 3:16-17.
“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.”
When I have brothers and sisters in Christ who bring me back to the word in order that I might become complete and equipped for every good work, folks… there is nothing greater! Those are GOOD FRIENDS!
As I think about these people in my life, I also must ask myself, “am I that kind of friend?” Ya’ll I love my friends. I have some of the best in the WORLD! No joke! Relationships both male and female. GASP! Yes! You can be friends with the opposite sex and it be centered around Christ and be holy. These men of God provide as much insight into my walk with Christ as my best gal pals do.
I talk a lot about my soul sisters on instagram. Every breakfast, lunch, dinner, and coffee date (I know there is a food theme there… what can I say? I like food) I come home energized and charged up. At 37 years old, I can finally say I have found the balance of friends that give me life and don’t suck the life out of me. Sure we all have obstacles and challenges and need a shoulder to cry on, but I still feel refreshed and cared for even after caring for my friend. That is true friendship.
What’s the secret to great friendships? I have long held the theory that I need to be a good friend to have good friends. I have not always been a good friend. Let’s face it, I sucked. I have said awful things, abandoned people when they needed me, shared secrets, gossiped, and just been sucky. Thank you Jesus for forgiveness and your Word to correct me! When I realized that I was attracting toxic people because I myself was toxic, something had to change. To be honest, it also meant that for a while I was without a lot of people in my life. I really needed to fix my soul and discover who I was and wanted to be. That was some intense Jesus time.
My heart is for growth in Christ. If I am signing up for that, I have to understand that fire refines. The heat needs to be applied to my heart to work out all those impurities. That’s not always easy. The end result however is beautiful. After years of self understanding and refining fire, I was ready to be a good friend. So here I am a decade later basking in the glory of solid people in my life. All are different. Some of them don’t even know each other. The common thread with each of them is they offer so much goodness to my soul. They challenge my walk with Christ. They encourage me to dream big. They kick me in the rear end when I need it. They pray for me. They share the word with me. They love me.
We all need these kind of friends to help us run the race and carry the torch of life. Christ didn’t set the model of life alone. Immediately after his temptation in the dessert, Matthew 4:11 states, “Then the devil left him, and behold, angels came and were ministering to him.” Even Jesus had someone caring for him. His next assignment was to find disciples to surround himself with. I believe that Christ needed them as much as they need Him. If Christ chose to surround himself with a group, so shall I. We need each other. You need good solid Jesus lovin’ people in your life. So go be a good friend and go find some good friends, your soul will thank you.